Ben sought my help as he was on the brink of burnout. He had set up the Dubai office for a renowned European tech firm and had grown the team by 500% within 12 months. The business was growing exponentially, with numerous projects and clients from across the region. Despite the success and financial freedom, Ben was miserable, working excessively long hours, had not taken a proper vacation for years, and started to dislike the person he had become in his relationship – always working and not present even when he was home. He felt burdened by the rules, regulations and deadlines imposed by Headquarters and did not have time to properly train his team to take over some of the tasks still on his plate. He felt completely overwhelmed and had no more capacity left.
Through our conversations, it became clear that Ben’s leadership was all about being the safety net for the organization, constantly putting out fires, and trying to keep everything running. His early-week calendar looked manageable, but it quickly filled with ad hoc meetings as the week progressed due to client requests or project issues. Ben was fixing everything, unwillingly making himself indispensable and creating a dependency for his team. This situation was clearly unsustainable.
At one point, he started to see that it wasn’t Headquarters, the team’s quality, or demanding clients that put him in this situation. He realized it was his overly developed sense of duty, his tendency to be agreeable, and his desire to be helpful to others. He found it extremely difficult to say NO, worried about the consequences for him or the business.
From that moment on, we started to establish that what he needed was:
1. Create ‘white space’ in his calendar to think. To do high-level strategic thinking work, the work that only he could do. Thinking time to focus on the future of the business instead of the day-to-day operations.
2. Clarity about his role: He re-created his own job profile with clear boundaries of his responsibilities. He included this in a presentation about the future of the Dubai office and requested to hire a manager to support him. To his surprise, he got permission from the board to hire two associate directors.
3. Delegate more tasks: He started to delegate more tasks to reduce the team’s dependency on him and empower them to take more responsibility.
4. Develop a more open culture within the team: He initiated team meetings where people shared more about themselves and their projects, fostering openness, commonality, and shared responsibility. This led to more mutual support within the team.
5. Prioritize personal time: Ben stopped working on weekends and booked regular time off for trips with his wife.
Gradually, Ben reconnected with the person he had forgotten he was and became the leader he had always wanted to be.
Leaders who are highly motivated by their desire to help others often struggle at the expense of their own well-being.
Once they learn how to set clear boundaries, prioritize planning, delegate more, and create a culture of shared responsibility, they can shift from being a fixer to being a leader - from dependency to empowerment.
Let’s Lead!
Ben’s name is changed for privacy reasons
